How Not To Eat: Weird Vegan Foods We've Eaten When There Were No Decent Plant-Based Options
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We all love eating delicious vegan food, but let's face it, once in a while we all come home to a bare fridge, we are in a hurry or simply we can't be bothered to cook. Here's some of the guilty non pleasures the team (and friends) at Ethica Magazine have shamefully admitted to having tucked into it in moments of great food desperation.....

 

 

Chunks of raw tofu cut straight from the block...at the office desk....

Let's start with one of the most gross...who'd cut off chunks of raw tofu at their desk and call that a meal? Well, that was me actually. I didn't have time to make lunch the night before and there was nowhere to get vegan food... One of the most depressing 'meals' I've ever had. In my defence, at least it was hazelnut tofu....

 

Seitan straight from the packet dipped into vegan mayonnaise

This, whilst by no means a nutritious meal, it's a step above the block of raw tofu. Our food editor Danica, indulged in it recently...straight from the fridge.

 

Spoonfuls of mincemeat 

When Danica recently felt like something sweet but there was nothing in the house, she satisfied her cravings by eating spoonfuls of mincemeat. At least it was homemade.

 

A chocolate treat... 

Spoonfuls of mincemeat sound delightful compared to this... In a desperate quest to satisfy a particularly violent sugar craving, I once ate dark cocoa powder mixed in with spoonfuls of sugar for 'pudding'. Well, once, it was more than once. At least another time I had the genius idea to jazz it up with a measure of whisky and get it all creamy. No, it still wasn't good.

 

Lentils or chickpeas straight from the tin

This is not too bad, and it's probably happened to lots of vegans when out of food: lentils, beans, chickpeas eaten straight from the tin. If I feel fancy, I add a little salt and olive oil.

Stale bread and water

Yes, this has actually happened and I was neither in jail nor playing a character in Oliver Twist.

 

A pairing made in hell...

Banana dipped in hummus. This perversion was eaten by somebody I know and she claimed it was good too. I never understood why she didn't eat the hummus first and the banana after, but hey, she's from up north.

 

Pasta/rice with...nothing on it

Not a weird thing per se, but a horrible reminder of penury...

 

Raw Brussel sprouts dipped in chutney

Because my friend couldn't be bothered to cook the sprouts. He still claims that 'It was quite nice actually'.


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What can I say, I had a craving for salt and umami...